The Distance Between Us by Reyna Grande

When I finished reading Reyna Grande's memoir, The Distance Between Us, I had to just sit and digest everything I had just read. Grande's story is awe inspiring and deeply moving. A story of a child coming up against great odds and finding the strength inside to keep working toward a brighter future. 

The story begins in 1980 in Iguala de la Independencia in Guerrero, Mexico. Reyna is 4 years old and has been living with her mother, older sister, and brother in a small rented house. Reyna's father, Natalio, left two years prior to try to make money in the United States. 

When we first encounter Reyna, she and her siblings are gathering their belongings to go live with their Abuela Evila, their paternal grandmother. Reyna's father has called his wife to join him in the states, leaving the three children without parents. In a short time we learn that Abuela Evila is a cold, harsh woman and the children are treated like unloved orphans.  The children mourn the loss of their parents to El Otro Lado, the other side. They fantasize about what it must be like in the United States, especially after their aunt returns to Mexico for her daughters quinceanera, telling the children that money grows on trees there. 

Over the course of their time in Mexico, the children encounter difficulty, disappointment, malnutrition, and abandonment. Luckily, their maternal grandmother, Abuelita Chinta is a kind and gracious woman who raises her grandchildren to the best of her ability. In 1985, Natalio returns to Mexico with his new wife, Mila. Upon witnessing the state of his children's lack of cleanliness and nutrition, Natalio decides to bring the children with him across the Mexico/California border. Reyna isn't quite 8 and the journey is arduous and terrifying. After two failed attemps and a threat by Natalio to take them back to their checked out mother, they successfully cross the border. 

Life in Los Angeles is completely different from life in Mexico. Their new home, their town, their school. It's not the beautiful place with money growing on trees they had heard about their whole life. Reyna misses the warmth of her Abuelita Chinta and the freedom they had in Mexico. She feels a deep need to make her Papi proud, to prove to him that bringing her to El Otro Lado was the correct choice. One day her teacher announces that here will be a school wide writing competition. With the help of her ESL tutor, Reyna writes about the story of her birth in the little shack in Iguala. When her book is not selected and she is overcome with disappointment, her teacher ensures her that one day she will learn English and have as much success as any other kid in the class. That day, Reyna promises herself that one day, she'll write a book that will make her father proud. 

As the years progress, Reyna learns English and has a passion for reading. Her home life is tumultuous, at best, and her father's alcoholism and bitterness bleed into the rest of the house. Finally, after battling disappointment after disappointment, Reyna enrolls in college. In her requisite English class, her teacher, Diana Savas, notices Reyna's talent as a writer. Diana works with Reyna to improve her writing and becomes a close confidant. When Reyna's home life becomes intolerable and she has nowhere to go, Diana opens her home to Reyna and for the first time, Reyna is living in a happy and supportive home. Diana shares her love of literature, food and film with Reyna, opening up new worlds to her. She encourages Reyna to keep working on her writing and to keep improving.

 Diana is the first person in Reyna's life to see how remarkable she is and embolden her to follow her dreams. With Diana's love and support, Reyna enrolls in a writing program as UC Santa Cruz and begins her writing career. In one of my favorite passages, Diana is encouraging Reyna by remarking, "If Alvarez, Cisneros, and Viramontes can publish their stories, so can you Reynita." Reyna follows that saying, "Neither Diana nor I could have known that seventeen years later, I would find myself sitting in Sandra Cisnero's dining room drinking champagne and eating carrot cake. That I would share a car ride with Julia Alvarez. That I would share the stage with Helena Maria Viramontes at a book reading."

I enjoyed every line of this memoir. Reyna's writing is beautiful and lyrical. Her ability to build up the scenes of her youth and experiences make them vivid and alive. Throughout the book, my heart simultaneously ached and soared for Reyna. I had not connected with the story of a DREAMer so intimately and immediately started thinking of my students. What events will they have come through before sitting in my classroom? How many of my students will be away from their families of origin and yearning for connection to them? How many of my students will be doing everything within their power just to survive? 

I feel proud of Reyna and deeply inspired by her. I feel grateful for Diana Savas and her compassion toward a kid that deeply needed comfort and connection. And I feel motivated to make sure my students feel seen, heard, and loved when they walk through the threshold into my classroom.